how
by smoakretz
Summary: Nick and Jess broke up, they decided this together, for their own good, because they thought that this relationship wasn't working. Maybe together they weren't working really great, but apart, it was even worst. -post season 3 ; songfic 'how' by marron five ; sorry, english is not my first language-


**hi guys, this is a little songfic with one of my otp, ness, with a song of my favorite band, maroon 5. hope you will like it as much as did writing it. the song's name is "how".**

**btw, it will be nice if guys can tell me what you've though of this, because english is not my first language and i'm always happy to learn from my mistakes. so, if you find some, please tell me.**

**enjoy.**

**\+ i'd like to thank _cutiesarfati _for helping me with the language (go follow her on twitter guys, she's amazing)**

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Nick looked at Jess across the table. She was laughing, so was he. Winston just told an awesome joke about Ferguson. Since the break-up, everything was different, except maybe their friends. They were still stupid, but amazing. They could not blame them for getting in the way of their love, or for cock-blocking them. They were just the perfect friends. What was not perfect was their couple. Since the break-up, Nick was destroyed and Jess was broken. How could they survive to this ?

**I have been searching for your touch**

**Unlike any touch I've ever known**

She looked at him, than looked at her plate. She could not, she could not just look at him and feel like he was her friend. He was not her friend anymore. He was her soulmate, her lover, her best-friend. He would always be all of this. They never really stopped being soulmates. And the only thing she wanted now, was to hug him, kiss him and tell him to drive straight to Mexico like they did a year ago. She wanted to runaway with him. She never felt like this. She was searching for him, like never before.

**And I never thought about you much**

**Til I'm broken down and all alone, ohhh**

Everyone stopped laughing now, and they were just all eating silently. And he never felt so alone before. He never felt so down. He never felt like this before Caroline, or even after Caroline. It was just heartbreaking, but he had his friends. He had Jess. She was here, so he never really felt alone. Butnow, she was not here to tell him that it wil be okay, that she didn't deserve him anyway. But now, he was the one who didn't deserve Jess. Now, he was on his own, and all he could do was think about her.

**Though I don't understand the meaning of love**

**I do not mind if I die trying, ohhh**

**Took it for granted when you lifted me up**

Why did Jess have to watch fairytails ? She could not figure out why. All these things made her think that love always was a romantic storyline. But she met some guys and her thoughts about true and wonderful love disappeared. Then she moved in with those guys in the 4D. Then she fell in love with Nick. Then he kissed her. Then it was all blurry. He updated her version of love. He made her a 2.0 version of love. She loved that version, as much as she loved him.

**I'm asking for your help**

**I am going through hell **

**Afraid nothing can save me but the sound of your voice**

After dinner, everyone got up and washed their plates, like they were 12 years old. Well, maybe they were. But even though, they were still grown enough to know what Nick and Jess were going through. The three other guys left and Nick mouthed a "thank you" to his friends. He and Jess had to work this thing out. Something had to change, because Nick didn't know if he would survive without her. He needed to know. He needed to know if things could be fixed or not. Jess was heading to her room, when Nick took a deep breathe before shouting her name in the empty appartment 4D.

**You cut out all the noise**

**And now that I can see mistakes so clearly now**

**I'd kill if I could take you back**

She turned her head, answering with a little _"yep"_, not knowing what would happen next. Sure, she knew Nick, but she wasn't in his head, she didn't know what would come next. Then, silence. Awkward silence. Nick just stared at her for seconds that seemed like minutes or hours. She looked at him too, this awkward silence just reminded her how much she missed him, how much she loved him, how much she needed him. Deep down, she knew this break-up was a bad idea. She wanted him, so badly. She wanted him back.

**But how**

So, they stared at each other for minutes. Nick was a disaster and Jess was a mess. The break-up had mess up the both of them. All that they could now was repair the broken things they left behind them. Their hearts, their souls, their minds. Everyday is a challenge when the person you love is living with you but you can't reach them out, because it's over. It's simply over. Eventually, he broke the silence. He broke their contemplations. He smiled and told her that it was nothing, she smiled back and entered her room. Nick slapped himself for not being brave enough to tell her that he missed her and headed to his room. Jess sat on her bed, staring at her brown door, thinking about the first time they kissed. She got up and left her room. She stood in front of Nick bedroom's door before knocking. He opened the door a few seconds after and saw her. She placed both of her hands on his cheeks before reaching up and she kissed him. He kissed her back. And they never felt so good and relieved. She let out a breathe and placed one hand on his chest before adding _"Goodnight, Miller"_.

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**please leave your thoughts about this songfic in a review, in english or french, it would mean a lot to me.**

**bye, léouche.**


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